You play. You coach. And you cover for the others.
You take responsibility—but not the right kind of responsibility
You’re professionally competent and dedicated. You see what’s missing and fix it. And you’re exhausted. It’s not about stopping what you’re doing—it’s about making sure that what you’re doing actually benefits you. As an organizational psychologist, I often see the opposite: Hard work alone rarely moves your career in the right direction.
Imagine a soccer player who also acts as the coach on the sidelines—and covers for the two teammates who aren’t performing well enough. He might be the best player on the team. But he never gets a chance to show it.
It’s not a matter of skills. It’s a matter of where you focus your energy—and whether you ensure that the responsibilities you take on are commensurate with the influence and recognition you receive in return.
When you have your head buried in day-to-day operations, you overlook the informal and political landscape, which is crucial for gaining access to exciting opportunities.
It’s not that you’re too responsible. Responsibility is a strength. It’s that your responsibilities have grown far beyond your role—without a corresponding increase in your authority, influence, or recognition.
When your strengths in the workplace also become your limitations.
You may be lucky enough to have a manager who recognizes your potential and wants to help you grow. But you may also have a manager who focuses primarily on their own goals and image—which is often the case the closer you get to top management. For this manager, your stability and competence are so valuable to the team’s results that they—consciously or unconsciously—have an interest in keeping you exactly where you are. If you simply ramp up your efforts in the hope of being “discovered,” you risk burning out while your inner insecurity grows.
The challenge often arises because we instinctively ramp up our usual strengths when we encounter resistance. If you’re like the clients who most often seek me out, you’re probably:
Responsible. You naturally take responsibility if something isn’t working or is missing—whether it involves processes, relationships, or tasks. You empathize with others’ needs and have a deep understanding of your manager and colleagues, even when they fall short. You even take responsibility if your needs or feedback cause them discomfort.
Proactive. You take action and are there when help is needed—not just where your mandate actually lies. You’re used to succeeding under difficult conditions; perhaps because you’ve always had to in your life, or because you learned early on that recognition comes from being “easygoing” and helpful to others.
When your strengths become “overdeveloped,” they can backfire and become your biggest obstacle. They limit you. The answer is rarely to do more of what you’re already good at. It’s about examining what the specific situation calls for—and ensuring that you take responsibility for what is your responsibility, and if you take on more, that you do so consciously so it doesn’t have unintended consequences. This requires a conscious decision:
This requires a conscious decision:
What feels like the right thing to do?
Is it really my responsibility? And if not, whose responsibility is it?
Do I want to take that on?
What's the best way to handle this—who should I involve or talk to?
As the questions hopefully reflect, this process benefits not only you but also the workplace. My hope, however, is that you realize that even if these questions makeyou uncomfortable, they are still legitimate to ask. Because when you take on an extra responsibility that isn’t yours, you’re taking it away from someone else who should be bearing it.
Client Testimonial
I was recently promoted to lead a new team. I am incredibly proud of this milestone, and I am absolutely convinced that I have reached this point thanks to Mariam’s support and coaching throughout the past 8 months of my development program. Thank you so much for guiding me toward this milestone.
-Andrea, 31 years old. Head of Operations & Analytics at a software company.
I have worked extensively with complex organizations and identified competency needs during major changes. My experience ranges from team development to the design of leadership programs and specialized modules in project management and change management.
I have worked with leaders and specialists at organizations such as Novo Nordisk, Ørsted, Pandora, Bavarian Nordic, and government agencies. Whether you’re navigating an international company, a government ministry, or the consulting industry, I have a deep understanding of the political and strategic dynamics that characterize these types of workplaces.
My Experience and Approach
Price and Payment
Coaching session (90 minutes): 2,450 kroner (including tax)
Number of sessions: Typically 5–6 sessions, spaced approximately 4–5 weeks apart
Payment is made via MobilePay after each session. If your employer covers the cost, payment can also be made via an invoice sent directly to them.
It may be worthwhile to find out whether your employer can provide a professional development program. If your employer is interested in a customized program, please feel free to contact me for a no-obligation discussion.
FAQs
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About 1 month
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